I shouldn't have any internet connection right now... no, I shouldn't be writing this blog - right now, I should be on the road in my tiny Ford Ka, with most of my worldly belongings and a howling, shrieking, farting cat, on the long drive back to North Wales.
Here's a puzzle for you: I came here with said cat, in the tiny aforementioned Ka, with as much stuff as I could pack into it. I know that you imagine that a car, being made of metal, can't actually 'bulge" but mine was definitely bulging with content on the way here! Isn't a Ka made from Fibreglass, I hear some of you doubters ask... well, that isn't know for it's bulgey-ness either, is it?
Anyhow, whilst here this summer I bought a rather large and beautiful cupboard, a microwave, a few articles of clothing, a glass dome (it will house an alien monkey baby when I get round to making one!) and a large glass vase. And lots of plants which I potted up to take to my new flat in Wales. As the car had been at bursting point already, and as the cupboard was almost as big as my Ka by itself, I knew I had to hire a van. A fortnight ago I took that van with the cupboard, the plants and a whole load of other things up to the flat.
So I have smugly been relaxing here the last few weeks imagining getting everything back into the car being a doddle this morning.
Yesterday afternoon as packing reached it's frenzied apex, I decided I should start putting things in as I went along rather than doing it all at 6 am this morning before starting the journey. So I packed and stuffed and made use of every available millimetre of my little car... then it got dark so I just carried on packing and cleaning inside the house. This morning dawned and so did the realization that the amount of packed stuff + cat (+ Cat's material possessions) + driver left inside the house and the available space left inside the vehicle did not match. Not at all!
There would normally have been a huge tantrum at this point but I'm too old for that now and beside, I could barely move because I'm so achey - so jumping up and down in frustration is definitely not an option right now :o( so I went back to bed instead! Just got up now, seriously my joints are seizing up, I would have had to drive all 200 miles in 3rd gear and not turn any corners!
So, has my cat been on a huge spending spree or something? There simply is no logical explanation for how all the things I brought here can have suddenly expanded to twice their size during the summer. I know wood expands in the heat but not all my possessions are wooden. I don't understand!
Oh, well, a few cups of tea, a shower and some deep heat rub then off to unpack, cull, squish and repack the car, wish me luck!!!